My most treasured thing...

What day is it today...
And how many days have gone since all withered...
I dont know anymore... it looks like it was all just a dream...
Even my memories look blur at times...
And sometimes i can no longer remember clearly your face... your voice... your touch...
I've tried to move on countless times... But you're a chain too strong for me to break...
The harder i push the harder it hurts...
And that pain its the only proof i have that it was real... That you are real...
Times keeps pushing forward... Though i'm stuck in the same place...
I can't move on... i can't let go... something... its holding me back...
The little princess we used to dream about... i can barelly hear her voice anymore...
And i can barelly understant it between all the tears... all the pain...
Things have changed...
I have changed... I died... and whats left of who i used to be its just an empty shell...
I've tried to forget  you times and times again... But then i remember...
I look at what we had... I look at what we were...
And i just fall in love with you once more...

A day will come when i'll no longer be able to remember your face...
Your voice... Your smell... You...
My brain will betray me and blur all that was so clear to me once...
But i know... no matter how my brain tries to protect me from my love for you
By messing with those sweet memories... making them look nothing more than a dream...
I know... that my heart will always remember... And will always feel...
It will always rush when i hear your name... when someone talks of the past...
Or whenever someone mentions having a family...

I know so many people... I've seen so many things...
But not anything like what we had...
"Never again will i hide my self in shadows" i said...
But now i cant seem to be able to escape yours...
I cant stand it... Cant accept it... Cant let go...
I'm so tired of all this... All those stories on how True Love wins...
I can't believe them anymore... How could I?
Where are you now...?
I close my eyes... and i can no longer see you smiling... or hear the sweet tone of your laugh...
My brain wants to erase you from me... It wants to stop this everlasting pain you've inflicted upon my heart...
But my heart wont allow it...
And whenever my brain makes me forget... my heart makes me fall for you again...

Im not only broken beyond repair... It feels like im not living anymore...
I've never felt nothing for such a long time... All the wounds healed eventually...
But not those you left me with... they're still there hurting as ever...
As you moved on away from my world... you froze it in time for me...
Nothing changes anymore... Its tedious...
Who are you? You who my heart wont allow to go...
You who wherever i go... whatever i see... whatever i do... seem to be present...
My brain blocks every though of you... But i know you existed...
Even if i cant clearly remember... I know...
Even if it looks like an ilusion... I know it was real...
And i can't seem to move on... i can't seem to care about anything else...
I've tried... I've failed... Yet again... I fell in love with you... Just by trying to remember us...
And all those foggy memories become clear... And i see your beautiful face... and hear your voice...
And i understand... why my heart wont let you go... even if it kills me more... even more... everyday...
Thats why... this pain... thats kills me... it is... and always will be... my most treasured thing...